Ok not a tru story but anyway...

My uncle Phil was a paratrooper for the Vietnam War. On the way down he searched for his parachute. he found a beer and drank it. And then he found a six pack of beer and drank it. he found the parachute and landed safly inbetween 40 vietnamesse soilders. He killed 20 with his gun until it ran out of ammo. He killed 15 of them with his machete until sombody broke it. And he killed the last 5 with his bare hands.
The Morel of this story.......Dont mess with my uncle phil when he's drunk.